Tea with Jam & Bread: August 2013

Aug 30, 2013

Class, the POINT is...

Every day with fifth-graders:

Conversation #13, 8:20 a.m.

Mrs. D: ...Now write your own sentences using these new vocab words.

[20 seconds later]

Student #1: Do these sentences all have to be true?

Mrs. D: No, you can make up sentences. Like Brandon's earlier sentence about space aliens -- he doesn't really think aliens are coming to Earth.

Students #1, 5, & 17 [in unison, earnestly]: But what if there really WERE space aliens coming to Earth??

Conversation #79, 9:58 a.m.

[Mrs. D is describing Black Friday, to demonstrate supply and demand.]

Mrs. D: There are so many people who want the same thing you do that they might grab it out of your hands.

Student #1: But why can't you just grab it off the shelf and run?

Student #2: Because there's too many people in the way.

Student #3: I would just have my little kid hold it and run in between all their legs.

Student #4: No, I would...

[ka-boom! a fast-paced dialogue on Black-Friday strategies is now underway...]

Conversation #153, 11:41 a.m.

Mrs. D: I want you to describe your home. Write down at least three details - could be its location, size, color - things like that. Just short and sweet.

[20 seconds later]

Mark [hand in the air]: I have a question! Well, you see, my house is brick, but I can't figure out how to write the color.

Mrs. D: Isn't it red or orange?

Mark: No, it's not really red or orange, kind of in-between..."

Mrs. D [patiently]: Just brick is fine.

Mark: But you said to write the color.

Mrs. D: Well, red-ish then.

Mark: No, but see, it's not really just reddish either, because a long time ago my little sisters drew on it with chalk, so it has like purple and blue and green spots on some parts of it --

Mrs. D: -- Just write brick.
[9 more minutes till the lunch bell...]

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I should clarify:

We like our students -- a great deal, actually. Mrs. D. doesn't really count down the minutes till lunch.

We are just impressed with their indefatigable ability to generate questions about any thing under the sun...

Aug 28, 2013

Aug 26, 2013

More from the fifth-grade classroom:

Incident #1: Cold showers

I was telling my students about Mongolia. I told them how the running water broke at camp, so we had to go down to the river to take baths instead. I confided that I have been taking cold showers every morning since then - on purpose - because I just like them better now instead of hot. (This is true.) They thought that was really strange. (Understandably. I don't understand it either.)

This morning one of the girls comes up to me and says, "Guess what, Ms. Eckstrom? I took a cold shower last night."

Me: "What? You did??"

"Yeah." [pained look] "It was coooold!"

(And she wasn't the only one who tried it, I found out.) Will this come up at parent-teacher conferences?

Incident #2: Logic

New vocab word: logic. Mrs. D told the students to think up examples.

Fifth-grader [matter-of-factly]: "It is logic when you go out the door in the morning, and all the neighbors are staring at you, and then you realize, 'Oh, duh! I forgot to put my pants on.'"

In the back of the room, I blink. Mrs. D pauses for just a second, then says brightly, "Yeah, don't you hate it when that happens?"

Aug 22, 2013

Duck Dynasty and consciences

First week of school with my fifth-graders.

Get-to-know-you activities can elicit unique answers.

Mrs. D: How many siblings do you have?
5th-grader: Am I supposed to count myself?
Mrs. D: Are you your own brother?
5th-grader: No. [Pause.] But my conscience is.

On a student's worksheet:

Question: What do you want to study this year?
5th-grader's answer: Sppelling

Mrs. D: What's your favorite movie?
5th-grader: Breakfast Club.
Mrs. D: Breakfast Club? Well, that's a classic.
5th-grader [airily]: It's only eighties.

Mrs. D: What's your favorite TV show?
5th-grader [innocent drawl]: Duck Dah-nisty an' Law 'n' Or-dur.

Mrs. D: What's your favorite food?
5th-grader [big glasses, serious/deliberate]: First of all, lasgana, and second of all -- um, I don't know if you guys are going to think this is disgusting -- but, hotdogs dipped in applesauce.

Aug 21, 2013

the slow-going South

This weekend I took my sister down to Oklahoma to start her freshman year of college.

We went to Walmart to stock up on folders, notebooks, binders, etc. We got in line behind an older mustached, full-bellied man. He turned around and drawled out slowly, "Would you like ta git ahead a' me? Ya only got a few things and I ain't in a hurry."

"Uh, wow -- really? Um, actually, that would be really nice!" (Only because we were running late.)

Then the tiny white-haired lady next in line asked us if we wanted to go ahead of her too.

I couldn't help asking, "Is everybody in Oklahoma this nice?"

The mustached man chuckled. "Waaaay-ll, most of us are. We gen'rilly try to treat uh-thur people th' way we like to be treated."

Aug 14, 2013

go easy on the cello music, folks

This evening I was puttering around in my room. I had put a CD in the player, one of my favorites, of Yo-Yo Ma on the cello.

I left my room to vacuum the car. I came back: no music, someone had paused the CD. That's odd, no one is around.

Later I asked Gracie about it.

Me: "Did you stop my music?"

Grace [matter-of-factly]: "Yes."

Me: "Why?"

Grace [pauses, thinks assertively]: "It was CREEPY."

Me: "What? How??"

Grace [another pause]: "Because it was making me SENTIMENTAL, and I don't want THAT to happen."

Hmm. This may have something to do with the fact that she's currently in the process of packing for her freshman year of college. However, she never has been enthusiastic about "all that boring music you listen to without any words."